Attention Gadling readers in Mexico; keep your eyes open for a truck carrying 5000 condoms, 800 HIV tests and one 23 foot inflatable banana (wearing a condom).

The truck should stand out in traffic, because the sides are painted with that same banana, which from what I understand, is not a standard factory delivered color.

The Condomovil was parked outside a house in Mexico City, but by morning it was gone. Police have no idea what the motive could be (I can think of several reasons). The value of the stolen truck and its contents is about 200,000 Pesos, a little over $18,000.

The truck has been touring Mexico since 1998, and the project has since handed out over 1.2 million condoms. Unless the Condomovil is found, the project will be canceled which would be quite a blow to the Mexican federal health department.

What I really want is a cheap airfare to New York City from Columbus, Ohio. Since that's not on my horizon, I'm taking an Amtrak train from Cleveland and a Greyhound bus back. For adults traveling with children, both offer a discount that can't be beat.

If I were to head to the Caribbean, the Bahamas, or Bermuda, I might find different options that would put a cheaper airplane ticket in my hand. According to a recent "Practical Traveler" in the New York Times,' there are tickets for a bargain to these tropical locations.

Check out American Airlines, JetBlue. and Air France for the deals. Perhaps, you'll be lucky and an airport near where you live will have one of those bargain flights to a place you'd like to go. Going to Cancún out of JFK airport in New York City is only a few dollars more than a trip to Denver, for example. Denver's nice, but I wouldn't exactly call it a destination for a holiday.

Yes, I did go to Denver myself two years ago and considered it part of a summer vacation, but there weren't any hours relaxing by a pool.

One day, I might be looking to head to the tropics, but for now, it sure would be great to find a deal to New York. My son who is six years-old thinks Greyhound will be swell.

Also, an airline to keep an eye on for a travel deal, according to the article, is Southwest. As the article points out, Southwest has not offered a travel deal for awhile.

Tijuana, San Diego's cross-border Mexican cousin, has long been known as a place that'll get you what you want, when you want it. And if what you're looking for is an early death, according to the New York Times, the city can help you with that too.

Visitors to Tijuana are accustomed to street hustlers peddling marijuana, cocaine, and girls, but a far more dangerous product lurks on the shelves of Tijuana's pet shops: pentobarbital, commonly known as Nembutol, which is often used to euthanize animals.

The Times describes the drug thusly: "The drug, pentobarbital, literally takes a person's breath away. It can kill by putting people to sleep, and it is tightly regulated in most countries. But aging and ailing people seeking a quick and painless way to end their lives say there is no easier place on earth than Mexico to obtain pentobarbital..."

The drug costs about 30 dollars for a dose, and according to some sources, hundreds of people have already traveled to Tijuana from the US, Australia, and elsewhere, to purchase the drug for human consumption.

More here.

"I'm done." I said in Spanish as I smiled and looked at our waitress, "Muchas gracias!", I continued, beaming at my Spanish prowess. She smiled back -- actually she looked like she was struggling to hold in laughter when I realized my error --- I had just told her I was done like DEAD. Ack! The embarrassment of the situation got me, I smiled sheepishly and dragged Tom to the exit to make a quick escape.

When traveling in a foreign country it is important (and so much more fun!) to try speaking the language -- even just the tiniest effort can make all the difference. So far the Mexicans seem to be pretty encouraging, they happily smile and nod while we stumble through our limited Spanish. They even are nice enough to pretend that we are making sense!

When you are learning a new language you are going to make a lot of mistakes, that it just the way it goes and, of course, the only way to learn is to make a few errors. However, there are some things that would be nice to know before you start chatting away in another language.

Here are a few tips for Mexican Spanish that you might want to keep in mind to prevent awkward speaking situations:

The other night we were sitting with a friend enjoying a few Pacificos when he asked if he could turn the fan on to keep the mosquitoes away. As one who always get bitten by these bloodsucking irritants, I was more than happy for the fan to keep me bite-free. As he clicked the fan on, our friend casually mentioned that with the rainy season comes dengue fever, which is not too dangerous,"unless you get Dengue Hemorrhagic Fever (DHF)..."

Excuse me? The what?

Before we left on this trip we went to the travel clinic to get the necessary shots as well as the medications we might need. As we will be traveling through high-risk malaria areas we stocked up on anti-malarials and brought along a good supply of bug spray. I figured malaria, not dengue fever, would be our biggest health risk. Truth be told, I have never been too concerned with dengue. I know that it can make you quite ill, I know there are no drugs to treat it but what I didn't realize was that you can potentially die from it.

Check out this amazing photo. Two times a year in the late spring and late autumn, up to 10,000 Cownose stingrays make their way between their feeding grounds in western Florida and the Yucatan Peninsula in the Gulf of Mexico. This amazing shot of the migration was taken by amateur photographer Sandra Critelli.

As soon as I saw Sandra's image, I immediately wanted to know where it was taken. According to some quick research, she apparently encountered this awesome phenomenon while on a Whale Shark expedition off the coast of a small Mexican island in the Yucatan called Holbox. As intrigued as I am by her photo, my interest was instantly piqued by the mention of whale sharks - huge, plankton-feeding fish that can grow up to 40 feet in length. Holbox is apparently whale shark paradise, hosting numerous opportunities to dive with huge creatures.

Between huge schools of stingrays, giant whale sharks and plenty of other sea life at diving hotspots like Cozumel, the Yucatan peninsula is a diver's dream.

Maybe it's just me, but the first time I heard the words "fish" and "taco" together I felt rather nauseous. But, the ol' fish taco is definitely Baja's favorite and most famous meal -- be it breakfast, lunch or dinner. Just about everywhere you look there is a taco stand accompanied by a sign with a happy looking cartoon fish encouraging you to come over and try this local specialty.

The customs officer who helped us with our paperwork in Tijuana was the first person to mention the fish taco. In fact, he recommended that we eat as much fish as we could in the Baja. I don't mind fish but it seems like a risky food to consume at an outdoor stand...really how long can shrimp sit in the sun before it becomes a hazard to someone's health?

Rumored to be a creation of Japanese fishermen, this meal was the word on everyone's lips by the time we reached Southern Baja. "Try the fish taco" was pretty much a daily occurrence. Usually, I am game to try most foods but for some reason I pictured this dish as a soggy taco with undercooked fish coated in a slimy sauce. I hadn't even seen a fish taco in actuality but already this figment of my imagination had turned my stomach against it. Soon, though, curiosity got the better of me and I wanted to see whether the fish taco was any good -- so I came up with a plan. This well-devised plan was to get my husband Tom to try one and let me know how it was.

Todos Santos, the little town I mentioned in my last post, offers a quiet escape from the typical vacation destination of Cabo San Lucas. This small town is home to a mix of Mexicans, artists, surfers and ex-pats and offers some of the best surfing in the Baja. Pair that with great places to eat, interesting galleries, beautiful beaches and cheap beer and you have a pretty perfect vacation spot.

To get here you will need to fly into the San Jose Del Cabo Airport and either rent a car or hire a taxi. It is more cost efficient to rent a car and the SJD airport has numerous car rental agencies to choose from. The highway from Cabo San Lucas to Todos Santos is apparently the most dangerous road in Mexico, so make sure you are prepared to focus on the journey ahead. If you are tired after your flight, spend a night in Cabo San Lucas and head out the next day refreshed and ready to enter the madness that is Mexican driving.

Once you arrive in Todos Santos, you will find that there are numerous places to stay as well as some truly great places to eat. Be advised that most of Baja California Sur has been affected by the influx of foreign money, so prices are higher than those found in mainland Mexico but they are less expensive that Cabo. That being said, depending on the time of year you travel, here you might be able to negotiate lower room costs, especially if you are planning on a longer-term stay.

Where to Stay: Short -Term
Don't be surprised to find the hotels in Todos Santos starting at about $45US a night for pretty basic accommodations. The Maria Bonita Hotel, located at the corner of Colegio Militar and Hidalgo, offers clean rooms with hot showers for around $50US per night. The couple who manage the hotel are very friendly and will happily encourage all of your Spanish speaking attempts. Be warned this hotel is located on a main street so it can be quite loud at night. There also happens to be a laundromat below the hotel which also contributes to the noise by running at all hours of the day and night.

We are slowly starting to feel relatively comfortable in Mexico: things don't seem so unusual, and both of us are starting to notice subtle things. Well...if you can call gestures in Mexico subtle.

Chins tilting, cupped palms, and a version of the "OK" sign are only a handful of the gestures that I have noticed in Mexico. I wanted to find out what they mean, so we had our our friend, Iker (a Federali turned lawyer), help clarify the meanings. He was also nice enough to pose for photos.

Here are a few gestures you might come across in Mexico:

• Hurry Up!
  This gesture, shown by rubbing the forefinger and thumb together, does not mean money in Mexico, it means you need to get moving!
  
• Expensive
  Holding the thumb and forefinger up with the back of the hand to the viewer indicates that something is expensive. You'll see husbands making this gesture to their wives in the markets or other shopping venues.
• Cheapskate
  If you are haggling with someone and you notice someone else nearby tapping their bent elbow consider yourself insulted. Tapping on the elbow means "stingy" or "cheap" in Mexico.
  
• Cunning
  You should watch out for someone who is "colmilludo", which loosely translates to cunning or crafty. This is indicated by tapping one's eyeteeth which are called "colmillos" in Spanish. This gesture refers to someone that is always looking out for himself. Iker told us that it is used both positively and negatively it just depends on the context -- but I got the feeling that this is rarely used as a compliment.
  
• Asshole
  Yup...the one gesture you need to know the most since it resembles the Western "OK" sign. It is formed by touching the thumb and forefinger together creating a very small circle. This is extremely rude and never used to someone's face. See the gallery below to check out our friend Iker who kindly modeled all the gestures for us...even the rude ones.
  
• OK
  As mentioned above the "OK" sign is the same here as at home. Just make sure that circle you make isn't too small!
  
• Lazy
  The gesture for lazy is a cupped palm facing upwards, like you are holding something heavy. One or both hands can be used in this gesture. This is highly inappropriate because it refers to lifting "huevos" (which is Mexican slang for testicles). Basically the meaning behind this gesture is that the owner's "balls" are so big and heavy that he can't get up!
  
• What's up?
  People will greet you with this gesture which is often just tilting the chin up or tilting the chin up with palms upturned and a shrug. It means "What's happening?" but you will also see it used as a general greeting. I have found even the youngest kids know this gesture and use it in replace of a verbal greeting.

It might take awhile at first to recognize these cultural cues but once you have an idea of what to look for you will see them used all over Mexico. Gestures tend to vary from place to place so it's probably best to use them when you are absolutely certain you know what they mean...after all, calling someone an asshole when you meant to say "OK" might not go over so well.

"No Wrong Turns" chronicles Kelsey and her husband's road trip -- in real time -- from Canada to the southern tip of South America in their trusty red VW Golf named Marlin.

Imagine you are driving happily along in Mexico, taking in the view, bopping along to some tunes, and smiling at how perfect your road trip is going. Then you notice a small noise: it gets louder and, with panic setting in, you pull over, let the car cool down and then try to start it up again to no avail. One look around confirms that you are broken down in the middle of nowhere on a desolate Mexican highway. Now what?

This situation has played over in my head since we arrived with our own car in Mexico. Breaking down in a city or town is one thing, breaking down in the middle of a deserted Mexican highway is a completely different story. We had one close call a few weeks ago when we sputtered into town after spending a couple hours surfing. We pulled into the local supermarket, got out of the car and watched as the car's fan belt promptly fell off. We were lucky that it happened in town and that a mechanic was located only three minutes away. What if it had happened on the highway hours from town? Fortunately the Mexican government provides a "heavenly" service for motorists in distress.